S04E05 - The Blood Boy

No: 33  |  Season: 4   Episode: 5  |  Air Date: 21-May-17  |  Ratings: 0.84


Cracks in Richard's latest partnership become more apparent when he's forced to deal with an unexpected interloper. As things get more serious, Dinesh scrambles to find a way out of his new relationship. After learning of surprising developments afoot at Raviga, Monica has trouble deciding which horse to back.

Director and Writers

Director: Tim Roche
Written by: Adam Countee


Gavin: This is where it all began, gentlemen. The birthplace of Hooli. Peter Gregory's mother's garage. That was Peter's workstation. This was mine. Things sure have changed. But in a way, they've stayed exactly the same. As we forge our new path together, we must remain focused on what's really important... not material success or wealth, but this, the spirit of innovation... a few coders, some ramen, and a dream. And that is why I brought you here. All right. Let me show you the rest of the place.
(Gavin opens garage door to reveal the gargage is inside a much larger garage)
Gilfoyle: Ah. You've got a garage inside your garage.

Richard: Is Bryce your assistant?
Gavin: No, of course not. He's my transfusion associate.
Richard: Which is?
Gavin: Are you really not familiar with parabiosis?
Richard: Can't say that I am.
Gavin: Well, the science is actually pretty fascinating. Regular transfusions of the blood of a younger, physically fit donor can significantly retard the aging process. And Bryce is a picture of health. Just look at him. He looks like a Nazi propaganda poster.

Erlich: This is quite the baby shower. I bet you think you're some big swinging dick, now that you're getting invited to all these fancy VC soirees.
Jian-Yang: Yes. My dick is very enormous... and my app made Raviga a lot of money... and I still pay no rent.
Erlich: Nobody likes a braggart, Jian-Yang.

Monica: Hey, guys.
Jian-Yang: Hello. Congratulations. You're pregnant.
Erlich: No, no, no. No, she... No, she... No, no.

Erlich: Monica... this is not a baby shower. This is a coup.
Monica: What are you talking about?
Erlich: Ed Chen didn't throw this party to impress Laurie. He threw it to oust her. Invite all these misogynistic A-holes who think that pregnancy is a weakness, convince them that she's shirking her responsibilities at Raviga. You said it yourself, there's more dick in here than a synthetic pussy convention.
Monica: I didn't say anything close to that.
Erlich: No?
Monica: No.
Erlich: Regardless, Ed Chen and Aarush are bro'ing down. I suggest you get in before you get cut out.
Monica: Tequila shots at a baby shower. You want me to join the frat house?
Erlich: Unfortunately, in this climate, Monica, you either bro down or you go down.

Erlich: Jian-Yang are you drinking creamer?
Jian-Yang: It's a half-half.

(Gavin finishes his blood transfusion)
Gavin: Hard work is the price of greatness, so let's get to work! Well, this meeting was just absolutely fucking great! Richard, Donald... Goldfoil! (starts doing karate kicks) Woo! Go team! Woo!
Gilfoyle: Uh... the fuck just happened?

Bryce: Gavin has obviously had a lot more success than you, Richard, and I just think having an asset like Gavin Belson on your side...
Jared: (gets mad) What'd you say? You dick!
Bryce: Whoa!
Jared: You dick! You dick!
Bryce: Okay.
Richard: Whoa. All right.
Jared: Fuck you!
(Bryce leaves)
Richard: Okay. It's okay.
Jared: I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Richard: It's okay. It's okay.
Gilfoyle: This is already the best job I ever had.

Richard: (About Bryce) Yeah, he's real. Real mouthy. I mean, he's sticking his perfectly symmetrical face into actual smart people's business. I mean, that Ken doll probably thinks traversing a binary search tree runs in the order of "n," instead of "log n." Idiot.

Mia: (to Dinesh) Brought you some dinner Neshi.
Gilfoyle: Neshi?
Mia: Shut the fuck up, Gilfoyle.

Gilfoyle: (to Dinesh) Hey, look, it's Osama Bin Fuckin'.

Dinesh: So, she's super attractive, and she's super smart, and she's way into me, like way more than a normal person should be. And sex! There's so much sex! The problem is the part after.
Gilfoyle: When you have to apologize.
Dinesh: No. When we do pillow talk.
Jared: Oh. That's the best part. Everything before that is just foreplay.

Dinesh: I have to end it, right now. First thing Monday. Well, Saturday is her sister's wedding. And then Sunday... you know, Sundays are just for me, you guys know that.

Erlich: I'm afraid you caught me at an inopportune time. I'm long overdue to a trip to my dispensary, so I don't have much. But I have Bubba Kush, Chocolate Thunder, Barbara Bush, Barbara Streisand, Barbara Bush, Jr....

Monica: I bro'ed down with him pretty hard. I mean, I think I did. It's... to be honest, I was kind of all over the map. I shotgunned a warm beer, and then I acted all blown away when he showed me 40 minutes of snowboarding videos set to Diplo remixes.

Monica: Why did you say I should bro down with Ed Chen?
Erlich: I say a lot of things, Monica. I say a lot of things.

Dinesh: I know you think I'm some sort of crusading badass who built a ticking time bomb and slipped it to Gavin Belson to bring him down as retribution for his wrongdoings. But the truth is, because of my gross incompetence during my brief and utterly disgraceful tenure as PiperChat CEO, I incurred billions of dollars in COPPA fines by exploiting underage users, and was saved only by my own cowardice, which led to me throwing up on myself.

Gavin: I had my blood tested this morning. My cholesterol is through the roof. At this rate I'll be dead by the age of 120.

Gilfoyle: I hate to invoke the Nazarene, but, Jesus Christ, what the fuck, Richard?

Jared: Sometimes you have to make compromises. I mean, I once slept with the head of an assisted-living facility to get my friend Muriel bumped up the wait list. Am I proud of it? No. Do I regret it? (shakes head)

Gilfoyle: You ratted your girlfriend out to the FBI, because you're too big of a pussy to break up with her?
Dinesh: I'll never tell, but yes, yes, I did. The FBI lady hit me in the face, so Mia's never going to suspect me.

Dinesh: All right! What has two thumbs, zero dick pics, and just quit Periscope?


"Stretch Your Face" by Tobacco (Opening title music)

"Cop Drama" by Clearside (Plays when Gavin is on the phone informing Richard he is going away)

"Too Many Rappers" by Beastie Boys (End credits music)

Notes and Trivia

The items in Gavin's garage have been identifed as (clockwise from bottom left): Honda Asimo robot (on its side with soccer ball), Penny Farthing bicycle, Cray supercomputer, silver Fisker Karma, garage, various kayaks and bicycles on the back wall, bronze statue of Gavin with animals, a Segway, 2nd Cray supercomputer (in back corner), silver Mercedes 300Sl, martial arts posters of Gavin, a series of 5 guitars (on back wall), Terrafugia Trans flying car, golf cart, SpaceX Dragon capsule, Volocopter, Triton Sub, silver Austin Healey. (Image)

Although Josh Brener (Nelson 'Big Head' Bighetti), Stephen Tobolowsky (Jack Barker) and Chris Diamantopoulos (Russ Hanneman) are credited for this episode they did not appear.


The writing on Gavin Belson's picture changed from the previous episode to this episode. (Unless this is a plot point, it is an oversight by production)


The interior scenes of Gavin Belson's Mansion were shot at 3300 Palos Verdes Drive West, Rancho Palos Verdes, CA. (Detailed information)


StarringThomas MiddleditchRichard Hendricks
StarringT.J. MillerErlich Bachman
StarringJosh BrenerNelson 'Big Head' Bighetti
StarringMartin StarrBertram Gilfoyle
StarringKumail NanjianiDinesh Chugtai
StarringAmanda CrewMonica Hall
StarringZach WoodsJared Dunn
StarringMatt RossGavin Belson
StarringSuzanne CryerLaurie Bream
StarringJimmy O. YangJian Yang
StarringStephen TobolowskyJack Barker
StarringChris DiamantopoulosRuss Hanneman
Guest StarringPhoebe NeidhardtMia
Guest StarringGraham RogersBryce
Co-StarringVince CefaluDelivery Man
Co-StarringJay CharanAarush Agrawal
Co-StarringTim ChiouEd Chen
Co-StarringKristen RozanskiFBI Agent